What a happy birthday dani!

So we went to Rush last evening to celebrate dani's 20th and sherrys vacation and vickys back to school and all that fun stuff. So anyway, its lots of fun dancing on one leg or while sitting. But the two top stories of the evening are as follows in countdown :

Runner up story: the cute boy in black, my favourite dance partner ever. He just danced! It was wonderful, no groping, no sleeziness it was wonderful. So anyway at one point i was sitting to have a break and he was lap dancing i suppose for me, so i stole his belt, how foxy. Sadly this story is not as good as it could have been cause i put the belt on and later while we were dancing he stole it back (rats) so im a bit of a failure; but he was such a nice dancer and held my leg so i wouldn't have to hold it up myself and we just danced like loons.

Grand prize winning story: Danielle to the rescue is the title. So Sherrie always manages to get these creeepy boys who won't go away. A couple times i had interrupted their grose dancing, but he just wouldn't take a hint, so i sent some of black shirt boys friend to get him off her, and still he came back...he was kind of that cat that sits on the porch downstairs, that dani yells at all the time. Anyway D is dancing up a storm as always, and sherrie and stupid boy are up on the stage, so i tell d to go help sherrie. Dani nods at me, leeps onto the stage, dives between sherrie and stupid boy, spins sherrie who promptly gets off the stage now that she is free of stupid boy. D dances with stupid boy for all of three seconds before giving him a friendly shove off and spinning down under the bar off the stage. The whole thing took about 1 and a half minutes. Amazing. And still stupid boy didn't take the hint, but the effort was so valiant and so blatant, and half the bar was watching and pointing and laughing, i guess sherrie is just that hot...granted after we sucessful got stupid boy to buzz off she promptly disappeared with another boy...oh sherrie amour

the most beautifully honest moment of the week

I'm tired of calling you and missing you and dreaming I've slept with you; and i i was just thinking...


i wish more of the world could be so brutally honest. I spoke with a young woman today, did an interview for the research Im supposedly conducting, she's from Rwanda, lived there through the war, through the genocide.

But what do you do, ask, so were you Hutu or Tutsi? or a moderate. Where is your mother now, dead! yikes. But how can you be honest? Damn I'm back to this again. Well at least i know that i only have about a years worth of thoughts, and now we're recycling the old ones, polishing the ugly parts and regurgitating the same debate. Honestly lying about trusting you, wanting to punch you, trying to fight all the rythems inside. bts soon, im glad, i need imput.

peace

mmmonday...again

hmm mondays are very interesting to me...well by that of course i mean to say...seb has surgery today...goodluck; kyle has a birthday today...happy birthday; i have to finish dani's present today...could be useful

i think that i will draw something.. no lets be honest, i'll work on the design for the dress.

xox

today is friday

is anyone ready to FREAK OUT, talk about free floating unidentified anxiety. my goodness, i go to sleep worrying, i wake up worrying, i go to work for bike rides and runs and all i do is just worry about stuff.

le sigh

okay, so i ran lots yesterday, and only my mcl regoin hurts today...i dunno i suppose thats pretty good. there's no deep pain or swelling. maybe ill just not have surgery...although waiting 13 months for surgery is kind of like not having srgery anyway. so maybe ill go for the provincial squad this spring, why not? i could get really hurt then and get emergency surgery. oh frabjuous day.

im back in my program. what luck, hey, Marty is teaching though so i guess i was a little bit a shoe in. but then we think the same nd write a lot alike so thats voondervel. oh i have to go do an interview. i hope it goes well.

kite

Surgeon for hire

So anyone with any information on knee surgeons interested in performing an ACL repair surgery, i have the goods on what needs to be done, but i would like it to happen before i turn 24. i am willing to give up one more season, but not three more seasons. so yea...thanks.

M

cross my heart and hope to die

yes. the rumours are true, i let someone stick a needle in my head this morning. It was completely professional there is no reason to panic. but boy do i feel much better now that the needle is out of my head.

So toronto, im coming home for a vacation. its too exhausting and i need the break. 17th-20th. Man of war. what a bloob blah day. i think im going to do some writing.

b thok

what a horrible place, where words are so powerful. where to see these morphemes linked together have such lustful movement in our deepest soles. where the strongest little urchin can be crushed by a fragment of a misdirected thought. poor thing. poor thing. and to be involved, to be informed of such crushing strength, the crushing strength of words.

crisis point again. building. is it easier to forget or to deny. is it faster to fight or lay down and die. what choice is there left to make when either choice is for defeat.

poor thing. poor thing.

this horrible place, where written words cause such disgrace.

a thok

Ive been having thinks about life and crisis and life in crisis. And about the state of things, about opinions about the way things flow and the need for more music that isn't for money. on that point i think i understand a little bit about what makes great music: its music htat just is. Some music you can listen too and just hear the dollar signs in the eyes of the writer, and its not that its bad music but really what you hear is dollar signs. Its strange because this is an idea that came to me from a long way away (gr 11 i think) when we watched that documentary about the porn star, and she said that to be a good porn star you had to really enjoy having sex, because the women who just do it for money you can see it in their eyes, its dollar signs. And i think that Miss Valentine was very right about that, and i think it translates into all things that make a person happy... ie music and dollar signs, athletes and dollar signs (e.g NFL vs CFL, NBA vs WNBA, Olympics vs IAAF world championship), teachers and dollar digns, gyms and dollar signs, politicians and dollar signs... the green motivation is devistation in the nation i watch through my sega play station, and the waves of insecurity that sweep those in positions of authority who know they inferiority to those with parrionate intent.

intent

this in an interesting motive/idea/ movement hmm... *currently listening to enya - celtic field*

anyway as i was saying about crises and life, im definately at a crisis point, to stand up and take the shot and let go of the baggage that goes with guilty or to remain obstinantly silent, emotionally sequre and carry the few extra pounds. I think i have to speak up, because maybe it will be bad and cause ruckus, but maybe it will make things better after the storm.

terrifying

i have discovered the most terrifying song ever concocted my anyone and it is "Flowers become Screens" by Enya and Enigma. I have never been more terrified while playing cards. Never. My goodness that was some crazy shit, and i hope i never play it again.

so on a completely unrelated note of being terrified, i had some accupuncture today. Yes thats right I paid someone who i could barely communicate with to puncture my skin with dozens of razor sharp needles and then i lay perfectly still and listened to classical music. Let me tell you a little story about scar tissue and accupuncture, the little needles must puncture the scar tissue...this is not a painfree process, but then again what is. No i have bits of tape all over my knee that make me smell like little old chinese women from the subway (a very comforting smell for a former frequent communter of the danforth line)

So life is lifing, i feel very in tune, but i can't quite hear the words so im a little lost (but the tune...got it with perfect pitch)

Crisis point is rapidly approaching, but thats okay cause im getting ready to ask the world for money.

bye

chug chug chug went the motor

i think the world needs a new soundtrack
and i think it should go bop bop bop went the wheels
or sing about the night in Tunisia

More

but i wouldn't be make believe if you believe in me

http://www.gethappy.com/more1.html

So i wonder where in the world Fraser Raney could be by now? Maybe he moved out and off to a distant country. i want to believe he is in Germany. or possibly Spain but i hope Germany, he would probably get skin cancer in Spain.

anyway, want more Bliss...check it out.

life as i know it

okay the knee is looking uffish. its swelling again and my insurence is expired so i can't get more treatement till i get my mums number. but i got to see the surgeon. nice fellow. doesn't talk much (mucho frustrating to not know,...ya know?)

Cleve is coming a touring next weekend and we are playing my favourite team :( well im photographing my fav team...

the boys are dummys and make life slow and boring. Dom phoned...just cause. i suppose im a dick, but im comfortable with that. besides i like to read peter pan...he's a dick too. without memory is an interesting concept. amnesia.

id like to call a dog that or maybe a goldfish

anyway. michelles an aunt mucho congrats

there was a reason i am writing but i forget. so happy nemesis day

hmm

and by cartilage you mean not ligements, and by flipped up under my knee cap you mean... thats gross

so i managed to luck into an appointment with a surgeon today... thats 24 hours after my initial assesment. 24 hours...versus 6-8 months. sweet eh?

but then bruising mean ligements says Naiomi (the PT) gahh. but locking and resticted movement means cartilege which means an earler surgery date. huzzah.

well life is lifeing, im in toronto for medical work. danielle wants to go home this weekend, so i need to find a way to deal with the cat (my little cocoa poo) i may ask the boss to bring her to tornto for me. we will have to see though. what the doctor oders (imagine if he had an MRI spot open this weekend, and surgery spot open next tuesday. Heaven ness/pas?

anyway
thats all i got.night

new news bad news news

so popi built me a shed. its beautiful.

the silverfish are back. i hate them with all my heart. there is one right now peeking in through the window at me.

i got a job offer from one of my professors. sweet. i have to put together a profolio and get back to him.

my big brother was cut. weep. im so upset, even though i know he isn't. well not that he isn't, he's made it, now its just time to learn, mature, grow and all that. but i still wanted him to play this year. BC lions are on my booing list along with knee specialists, knee injuries, sore knees, swollen knees, and silverfish. (although unlike everyone else on my booing list, the bc lions may be forgiven one day.

Prhyme just contacted me, and they finished the video. thats right im in a music video (shot in 2003...finishing in 2005...thats african time for you ;)

im ready to jump, this knee bull is really getting me down. i hope im never in a major accident that prevents me from using my body how i want too, i don't think i will make it.

crazy women, downstairs, doesn't like me, which is nice, she like d though so luckily we get all the benifits of her craziness but i never have to talk to her.

finally my little brother gave me a huge goodbye today. that was nice.

oki going to play with Adobe...thats hot

positive spin

hcokay, so i vas valking doon de streets, yuh; vhen i sees thees so sexy valking stick in the store vindow. and hi says to me self, zat eez so sexy. but as hi am not poorchasing thee sings zat i ham no needing zees sings like that have no uze to me, so hi ham having brilliant lightbulb. hi am busting my knee up so i can poorchase thees soo sexy valking cane. yah. that is, like hot.

so now i have uze for this soo sexy walking stick, and an hoppointment vith ze specialist zometime hoo i donno soon...i hope.

the rugby gods must be crazy

Jack says post, so fine.
they hate me
they think that im trying to ruiin a beautiful thing
well oden, you keep yourself hidden in the yew tree, and zeus you better not show your face outside olympus, and good ness gracious, if any of the other gods show themselves within two feet or a rugby pitch ill give them what for with my cane., fuck yea!!!

so the spleen is happy
the wrist is happy
the lungs are happy
the team was happy
and i was soooooo happy

and then
that jerkly number 2 from Chatham had to challenge me to a race. GAAAh

and one open field tackle later my MCL is busted.

fuck!

so now the spleen is happy
and the wrist is still happy
the lungs are laughing
and the team is crying
and i think im going to loose it!!

blast.

talking

okay im going home, team bonding happens saturday, but im going for some family bonding. probably some movies and some tackling.

i went for a run yesterday. tummy feels good. lungs not so much. more like needles in my pick tissue. they aren't very healthy. but we will work on it. i have a cramp in my hamstring. i think its from riding, and im light headed. but life is getting there. ive been going to practice. though not to practice. jsut to watch. its better than not being there. i guess. i need therapy for my wrist. it isn't healthy. i wonder when ill start going. soon i hope.

Belinda, you are lovely. but i think there is some crazy things in the world of politics. and love doesn't conquer politics...all but.

blah blah blah

funny story

okay, i dunno how many of you experienced the storm the other day, but those around here know it was a times a doozy. So anyway, lovely new home has a crack somewhere that the wind can pass through. but apparently it is cracked in such a way that when the wind passes through, it makes a noise of a some what musical sort of quality. well im sure it fits someones standards of musical. to me it sounded more on part with a small child bring murdered. so as the storm wailed one this petrafying high pitched shriek wailed on as well.

cocoa was not amused.

life at said moment

said that there was some excuse for moving so slow. i think there is a singular excuse...lazy heart. anyway. no rugby makes me a sad baby. and no writing makes me a sad baby. and no reading makes me a sad baby. and no shelving also makes me sad, as does the lack of energy and lack of unpacking. and so does the kitten who won't get off my back. sleeping is not good... well yea it is, but Im not doing it right, and the ants haven't shown hide nor hairy little leg in two days. i hope they are gone for ggood.

i want to make new shelves for my home.
or on second thought, i want to commission le petit frere to make shelves for the new home.
on third thought.. no i like the second thought just fine.

okay off to ethok

sick

erm.

eh hem. *cough, cough*
the man next door has an alarm, i suppose it is to tell him something, but it went off for four hours today. not just all none stop though. it would go and stop like someone was hitting snooze. Who hits the snooze for four hours? if it was me, id just turn it off, or unplug it, or throw it out the window, but not hit snooze for hours on end.

anyway, the system is infect with something.