the rockinest day of the year

isn't everyday.

Red Sky at night

Mourning is so odd. I just want to celebrate life, and laugh and smile and be thankful for the reminder. And praise the time Kendall devoted to doing the same. And yet with every breath the word is "Are you okay" "I'm sorry" "oh my gosh thats horrible". but never another one of us moves and here we are together. and here we continue in our time. Things get easier, don't they, not harder. We embrace and remember that our inflated egos are mistaken, we are only responcible for being mortal. For the time we have here, and i say now, cause my time is happening now. as is yours if you are reading this, or as you are reading this.

I feel lighter. Thank you and Bless Kendall. Rest now. Good luck. Everyone.

Red Sky

What a beautiful morning. I woke before sunrise, Cocoa was on my chest. Some mornings I cheat, I get up instead of lying in bed and sit on the porch with a cup of tea as the sky turns grey, and flares of red began to creep in at the sides. my porch faces the sunset you see. I moved the dead fig tree so i could have a spot. I thought, I shouldn't be indulging in the sunrise, there is work to do. A paper to write before work, real work. So inside to put away the dishes and take out the garbage; I wanted to stay out to watch the rest of sunrise, but a certain paper called me back inside. Nathan called. "Have a good day; that's an order" imparitive, will do. Danielle called, "Have another question; hating work" find an answer. What a weird day. Beautiful calm peaceful. And now raining, like the worst kind of pathetic fallacy.

At work before the boss. Nothing left over to do, so I continued homework. Emails sent and received. Cut my losses on time, multiply through. Then I thought Dani might have more questions, might need more help, so i logged into MSN. "Rip Kendall Hebret" And I thought. oh. It can't be our Kendall.

I just found out one of my players, from the Belle River highschool team, was killed in a racing accident yesterday. What a weird day. Good luck Kendall, take grace and innocence with you. take love and peace too. take talent and potential energy. good luck Kendall.

And here I am. There is such a beauty that comes with mourning. A peace, a space for reflection, indulgence, laugher. To be closer and more forgiving. Thanks Kendall, for the gift of this space.